The Almighty Pursuer

I just am taken aback at how extremely AWESOME God is. A couple of weeks ago, me and a friend studied together before a huge test. And yeh, physiology is cool and all, BUT afterwards, we got to talk about God and church. He wanted to get back into church, he really did, but just didn't know where to go or where to start. Instead, he had been wrapped up in worldly desires. It's one of those times that he felt that because he strayed from God, he would just keep straying because it was easier to do. It's easier to be of the world and IN the world. I got to tell him the awesome story of Edward and Earl, if you look back on one of my earlier blogs from June, I talked about them. And how much God will pursue them and will come and find each of them, no matter how far away they are. We see that in Luke 15. God SEARCHES for His Sheep and WHEN He finds them, He will take them back to the flock.

So, me and my friend parted ways that night, and God just put him on my heart. I began praying for him, that God would do a mighty work in him. That week, i went to my pastor, Angulus Wilson, and said, "Pastor, God is working on Him. He wants a relationship with my friend. I pray that God will give me persistence to keep being there for him. God is going to do something big. I dont' know what, or when, but He's working. Because He keeps giving me opportunities."

The next week was fall break, and on Monday I sent my friend a text to remind him about UCF and the times, and to make sure he was still planning on going. Wednesday afternoon, he sent me a text, and my heart about sank. Because typically when i get a text before i have invited someone to church, they are cancelling on me, BUT OH NO!! He was asking me what time it started! My heart leaped for excitement, because the Lord was working still! So we went to UCF and Joel preached an AWESOME message.

Then i invited my friend to New Beginnings Family Church on Sunday morning. I told him, i go to sunday school at 9:30 and it lasts till about 1:30, just to prepare him for the length of time it would be. So Sunday morning came and at about 8:30, i was beginning to get a little nervous. I was like, oh lord, please have him come today, please do not let him cancel, please wake him up and get him out of bed. At 9am, he called me and asked if i was coming. OH BOY!! even more excited. And now i was supposed to ride with 2 other girls to church, but God kept them in their bed till 9, because he knew my friend needed some time to tell me what's been going on. IF you don't think GOd orchestrates everything, you need to start paying more attention. We get to early morning prayer time and everyone is together for that part, well, right before sunday school, i'm like, "oh yeh, we are split up for sunday school." He looked at me like WHAT...umm...really? So i introduced him to the coolest college minister around and they went to sunday school. God is Good!

Then during service, Pastor preached from John 3:16, (he's going through the book of John and that's this weeks verse), and it was the most perfect God-breathed sermon for this particular sunday. When we stood up for the invitation, my heart got heavy and God was like.."tara, tell him you'll go, let him know it's ok to move." So once i finally got up enough courage i told him i would walk down the aisle with him if he wanted me too. He shook his head and closed his eyes and i did too. NExt thing i know, I hear claps of Excitement, when i open my eyes, there my friend was walking down the aisle to join the Church!!!

God is in the Pursuit Business. HE wants relationships with each and every individual.

I am so thankful for my church, b/c they teach the Word. They love people. They desire to seek the lost. They desire to make disciples of all men.

So it pains me to hear that we are stuggling to keep the lights on at the church. We can't even pay our pastor a salary. But God WILL make a way, He gave New Beginnings that church building in the middle of Midfield, and He will provide. So if you are ever wondering where your money could be used, where your money could be used for the sake of Christ, consider donating to New Beginnings this Thanksgiving, this Christmas, this month, or this year. It will be used to proclaim the gospel of Christ and to reach the city of Birmingham.

Address: 500 B.Y Williams Sr. Dr.
Birmingham Al, 35228

Website: http://www.newbeginningsfamily.org/

THe picture was from Pastor Appreciation over Fall break. Me with Kiki and Tanecia. Kiki is practicing her alphabet in sign language, and she knows 'Jesus loves me' now.

Speaking of sign language and kids. I think that God is moving me to be more involved at NBFC. I believe he told me last wednesday that i should keep going to UCF until my friend could go on his own, then i would be able to go to New Beginnings on Wednesday nights too. But you know what, God already worked that out too, cuz when i asked my friend where he wanted to go on wednesday, he said NBFC. Such an amazing peace that God gave me on where I need to be Wednesday nights. God wants to use me with the youth and the kids and just pour my life and my all over into them. I desire for them to be amazing Christian women who make Christ their number one priority. I desire for them to be awesome examples, so that others may come to know Christ. So be in prayer as i begin to make this move, to become more involved in my church, while still taking on pharmacy school. :)

Thanks!!

In His Service,

tara

update on life...and Luke 23

Goodness, so much has happened. I've in pharmacy school about a month now, and so far so good. I've had my first 3 tests, and 2 went well, but the Biochemistry test that i had today...umm..we shall see. The consensus of the class is that none of us had any idea what was going on. But still not an excuse for me not to do well on it. I'm staying pretty busy, which is good for me, because I do not like to be sitting around with nothing to do. In His Hands has been very blessed by God this year, because we have the most new people we have ever had in my 3 years at Samford. I'm extremely excited about it. The songs we are currently working on are Amazing Grace and Jesus Paid it All by K. Stanfill (which is going to be awesome! at least how i have it envisioned in my mind).
I have started a Bible study on monday nights for women of In His Hands and Samford Ministries Choir. We have met twice now, and I just love it. I dont' know how the 5 other girls feel, but I love meeting with other women and talking about GOD!! IT"S AWESOME! :) and hopefully once we all get to know one another better, we will be able to continue to become accountability partners with each other, so we may sharpen each other to make a stand for Christ. I also hope that by going into God's word with each other will draw us closer to each other. That is my prayer anyway.

I guess the hardest part this semester has been interacting with people in my class, the people i see every single day. The people i spend hours with every week. I want to get to know the students who sit around me, I really do, I just dont' know what to say. The atmosphere is very different from undergrad and especially very different from this summer. Please pray that I have patience and joy and understanding and wisdom every time i walk into russell 125.

Oh wow, read through Luke. It is absolutely incredible. i can't even think of words to express how amazing Christ is. The fact that he loved us so much to hang on the cross. Last night Brandon mentioned something after we read luke 23 and it spurred another thought. Christ knows everything, correct. He knows how many hairs are on our head and how many stars are in the sky. Because He knows that, he also knew exactly what tree it was that he was going to hang on with nails piercing his hands. I wonder how many times He walked by that tree and wanted to just cut it down. I can't imagine knowing the fate of a simple tree, knowing that one day I would be hanging from it. But Christ isnt' human! He walked by that tree and thought of ME and YOU! Christ loved us so much that he hung on a tree in complete agony and couldn't stop thinking of how AWESOME it would be to have us sit at his feet in Heaven, to have us share the good news with everyone so that all may have the opportunity to enter the Kingdom of God. He passed by that tree and let it keep growing because He wanted US in His presence forever. He wanted to Give US ABUNDANT LIFE!

I can not wait for that day.

back to school

so, i'm home and moved back to samford. i'm far from that gorgeous view of chicago, and back to 105 degree weather.

it was tough, i'm not going to lie. leaving the amazing group of 20 students that i have grown to love was incredibly hard. every night i send some of them a good night text message, cuz it's just too weird to not say good night. I forgot one night and was chastized by Celia. It was rather funny, she's like...it made everything seem so final when i didn't get a good night text! and i just can't have that. :)

since i've been home a few weeks before moving back on wednesday, i've had time to spend praying about various things that God has laid on my heart about what i am to do while i am here at school to continue being an ambassador for Christ.

1. i feel led to lead a bible study, sandy henkel gave me the idea or she showed me what had been in front of me all along. Pray that i can continue to allow Christ to speak through me and follow where he is leading. I've made flyers to give at the first In His Hands and SMC practice to invite women to come. I realized how much Christian women surrounding you is almost a necessity. They can be there to encourage, to uplift, to pray, to discuss, and to sharpen. So I pray that in the Bible study we can learn to pursue God more, learn to love ALL people more, learn to be prayer warriors, and put into practice all we have learned.

2. pray i will show students at samford the same love and compassion that i learned to show the people of chicago.

3. pray the church that i believe i have found in birmingham will be where God wants me. I went there this past Sunday and absolutely loved it! I can't wait to go back tomorrow.

4. Pray for In His Hands sign language ministry.

5. Pharmacy school-a bit overwhelming. Out of 1300 applicants, 123 of us are in the class of 2011. Classes start on Monday and it will be MORE than intense.

6. pray for the kids in Chicago who are losing hope everyday. the kids who work so hard and want to go to college but have to pay for their younger brother's funeral instead. the kids whose parents are drug and alcohol addicts. pray that God will display his awesome power and somehow show these kids an eternal hope and love. I pray that we dont' sit around and wait for someone ELSE to GO into these inner-city neighborhoods. I want so badly to go there when i am finished with school. I want them to have a chance to experience the love and saving Grace that Christ has so graciously given me.

II Kings 6:16-17 says, "Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those who are with them." And Elisha prayed, "O Lord, open his eyes so he may see." Then the Lord opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills FULL of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.

The Lord is on our side and has an army protecting us. I pray that You will surround me and every missionary and pastor particularly in the inner-cities with chariots of fire.

God help me, give me patience, give me wisdom. Give me the nations.

Pacific Garden Mission

So I actually teared up when we had to leave PGM today. I can't believe it's over. Pacific Garden Mission has definitely been one of my favorite places to work. Urbanus was so excited every time they told us to make hundreds and hundreds of sandwiches! Total, I think we made about 2,000 bologna and cheese sandwiches and maybe 300 turkey and cheese. The best part of sandwich making was getting into an assembly line rhythm and then singing disney songs or songs from classic musicals! and just for my family, we sang Jingle Bell Rock :) If we weren't making sandwiches we were wiping down tables and resetting up for the next meal that PGM serves to homeless men every day for lunch and dinner (dinner they serve twice). We would set chips and cakes and pies out for every single meal. I have never seen so many delicious chocolate cookies! Every thing they set out is donated. It's incredible. There was only one day that me and Katie actually served soup and sandwiches to the men who are homeless, every other day all the ladies who are there have to go to the back of the kitchen. We are not allowed to sit with them and talk. That made me sad, b/c it's always so interesting to hear people's stories, but we had to do as the staff told us because they know best.
Today, we washed 250 chicken breasts and backs. That was a lot of CHICKEN, but still so worth every minute of it.
So i can tell you about how much food we cleaned, prepared, washed, fixed, served, etc; but NONE will compare with the amazing men of God that we worked with all week. All the men who work in the kitchen have been through or are in the program at PGM, meaning that they are there to straighten out their lives, get off the streets, and detox themselves from any substance abuse they may have had. Each day we were pretty much finished at 1:30 or 2 and didn't have to leave until 4, so we had about 2 hours to get to know the guys, to hear their story.
Raymond just rejoined the program Sunday. He went through it before, but didn't graduate and 2 1/2 years later, he came back to get his life back on track. He looks to be in his 30's maybe. He was real quiet for the most part but would keep a huge smile on his face when we would talk to him.
I met Clarence this past Saturday at the Restoration Block Party. We didn't see him on Monday, but on Tuesday when he saw me, anytime i wasn't in his sight. He'd yell, "TARA!! TARA!!" then he would give me and Urbanus another job to do or he would ask me questions about stuff we had done this summer. He was GRAND! He actually had gone through the program at Restoration and a few years later he was drinking again and couldn't quit. his pride wouldn't let him go back to Restoration so in May he began the program at PGM.
Cliff the Kool-aid man! He was the biggest teddy bear i think i've ever seen! He was always giving us Kool-aid and telling us to take breaks.
Executive Chef Floyd Turnbull. He gave us the greatest compliment. He told us that we were the only volunteer group that he has ever got involved with. We were the only group that he has ever taken pictures with. We were the only group that he led around and wanted to be with. He was so funny. He would have all 5 of us watch him make rice and beef tips. He would let us put HUGE blocks of butter in the water. Then he would let us taste the finished product. Then when other cooks would need us to do something, he would go, "don't you see they are with me!" and none of us would be doing anything except watching. He was really awesome to be around because he is from St. Thomas and has the neatest accent ever!
I wish there was time to talk about each and every amazing man that we talked too, but this blog is long enough.
Those guys were so awesome. I loved every second i was there!
OCTOBER 13 THEY ARE MOVING TO THEIR NEW BUILDING!
God is awesome, b/c my fall break is October 15 and 16! How i long to come back for that! And they really want us to come back too.
They saw something different in our group, they saw Jesus. They could tell that our joy was coming from Him alone. Keep them in your prayers. All the men we worked with are learning each day that their satisfaction and contentment can only come from our Savior Jesus Christ.

last day of ministry sites

I can not believe that this is my last day of ministry sites. I can honestly say that there is so much more the city of Chicago than what meets the eye. It has such beautiful people.
My favorite part of the summer was ministry sites, not the John Hancock, not millennium park, not the field museum, not any of the touristy sites. part of me is excited to get back home and see where God will lead me and what I will be doing in tuscaloosa and in birmingham, but the other part of me is hating the sound of returning home. The circle of amazing Christian friends that i have been surrounded by everyday 24/7 has been incredible. I will greatly miss them all. Ok, well i'm off to Pacific Garden Mission NOW!! I"M EXCITED!! THOSE MEN ARE WICKED AWESOME!! we get to make sandwiches EVERY DAY!! :)

that sweet smile didn't come easy

oh man, it has been an incredibly awesome week!!
Edgewater daycamp last week was interesting. It was tough, i won't lie. And Celia really didn't like being there at all the entire time. But when you feel unwanted and not needed, it makes things difficult.
For me, i have mixed opinions. As a camp, i didn't really like it. But the moments when i was able to connect with the kids on an individual basis made all the bad things and moments disappear.

For example: Mario was blatantly disrespectful to EVERYONE! he would do the exact opposite of anything you told him to do and he would use foul language and tell me that it wasn't bad words he was using. Monday and Tuesday, i didn't know how to handle him or any of the kids really. Wednesday, the girls from 5th and 6th grade went to a water park and had a BLAST, so i didn't see Mario at all!! But thursday was really neat. We had been in the gym playing games, but it was time to go somewhere else. Of course Mario grabbed a ball and began playing basketball while everyone else was peacefully putting the balls away and leaving the gym. I asked him twice to please put the ball away because it was time to go. He didn't listen. Then i got an idea, if he is going to insist on playing basketball, then this might be a good time to show him some personal attention. So i walked over to him and said, "ok mario, i'll make you a deal. You can shoot three more times, and whether you make or miss those three shots, you have to put the ball away and go to the gameroom. Deal?" He agreed, but i could just see him shoot the three shots and then running to the other side of the gym and shooting some more. Then to make it more interesting, i asked if i could play defense against him. And as soon as he started to dribble and attempt to make it to the goal, i saw the angry disrespectful 5th grader melt into the darkness and a smiling, happy one appeared. I could not believe the drastic difference he had in the few seconds that someone chose to focus on him and his talents and not what he was doing wrong at the time. after his second shot, he gave me the ball and told me to try to make a shot with him playing defense. And, guess what! after he shot three times, he put the ball away and went to the gameroom. I thought i had witnessed a miracle!
Later in the afternoon, Amanda (the leader of the 5th grade for the week) told Mario that he had to sit out the first water game because of who knows what that he had done to deserve sitting out. Well, Mario can not sit still to save his life and he walked down the stairs to the kitchen, walked through the kitchen, through the gameroom, and as soon as he saw me following him he began to walk faster. He ended up in the gym, where he grabbed a basketball and took it to the parking lot. I knew that taking the ball from him would do no good and he would just start to complain and then run off again. So i said, "ok, lets practice your dribbling. you start on this end of the parking lot and try to make it to the other side with me playing defense on you." he agreed again. He made it back and forth and then shoved the ball into my hands and said, "you go!" it was about the sweetest thing i could have ever witnessed.
Last week, i had to learn a lot about the fruits of the Spirit. About patience, gentleness, self-control, and LOVE. The week could have been overshadowed by disrespectful kids and discipline problems, but those sweet moments that i was able to spend one-on-one time with the girls and Mario made all the bad fade into the darkness.

new set of eyes

OH MY WORD! God is incredible. He continuously shows me where my heart and where my passion lies here in the city. Before coming to project we were supposed to read "mercy Streets" by Taylor Field. When i read it before project, it helped my eyes to open a little bit to what is going on in the cities and helped me to see a tiny bit of what 'might' happen here in chicago. But oh my goodness, monday night our action group (girls small bible study group) decided that we really wanted to discuss the book b/c we haven't used it much and we all really enjoyed it when we read it the first time. So today while on our way home from our ministry site at Edgewater, i opened the book and began to re-read it. I can't tell you how differently i was able to read the book, after having truly seen homeless men and women, after seeing Al being changed forever because of prayer and persistence, after opening myself up to be taught by God.
Ok, now go forward in time a few hours to 7:00pm. For reflection night ( a time each week that we are encouraged to journal, read scripture, pray, and spend quality time with God), Lauren really wanted us to focus on the power of God and just how awesome He is. Me, Celia, Katie, and Kelly were leaving IIT to go to starbucks for our time of reflection, and i thought..."hmm..do i want my ipod? it would have been nice so i could block out some extra noise...but oh well, i don't want to hold us up any longer." (yes, that seems random, but just WAIT!!) at Starbucks for Reflection Time, we were all at different tables, reading, journaling, etc. And i was going through Psalms and Isaiah looking for verses that talked about God's majesty, or how i thought he displayed His majesty. THis whole time, it was thundering and lightening all around us. 30 minutes later, it began to pour!! It was so beautiful to see God's majesty displayed in a thunderstorm and thinking that his pinky finger pointed at Chicago and BAM the clouds were opened and the rain fell.

Jeremiah 10:12-13,16
"But God made the earth by his power; he founded the world by his wisdom and stretched out the heavens by his understanding. When he thunders, the waters in the heavens roar; he makes clouds rise from the ends of the earth. He sends lightning with the rain and brings out the wind from his storehouses...He who is the Portion of Jacob is not like these, for he is the Maker of all things, including Israel, the tribe of his ingeritance--the LORD ALMIGHTY IS HIS NAME."
yeh, i read that as it was happening! so amazing!
ok, going back to mercy streets, i was flipping through reading different quotes that were at the beginning of each chapter or sentences that i had underlined the first time, and understanding it in whole new way.
Some incredible things that HIT me were:
"The question is, not what you look at, but what you see." --Henry David Thoreau
"We can see only what we have grown an eye to see." --E.F. Schumacher
"Our point of view is determined by our point of viewing." --Paul Minear
"How strange that in order to learn how to see, we must remember what it is like not to be seen." --Taylor Field

have you noticed a trend yet?
My eyes have been opened and compassion has flooded in. Ephesians 1:18 is like a theme verse for us, it reads, "I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you , the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints."
ok, back to my story, sooo...as i was reading all these amazing quotes, Celia came over to my table and said, "look, do you see that man, he's been digging in the trashcans for food, and i even saw him drink something out of it, do you want to go see if we can get him something."
as i turned around and watched him walk back and forth from trashcan to trashcan, there was no way i could not go out there with celia to see if he wanted some food. So we grabbed or purses and walked outside, (where it was still raining, i might add) and as we approached the man Celia had been watching another man asked if we could get him some food. we were both sort of confused because we did not see him coming, so i walked more towards the man we had seen as celia told the other man that we would get him a pastry or something from starbucks. I asked the first man if he wanted some food or anything and he just looked at me like, No, i dont' want anything from you, especially not food. So i pulled out a tract to give him or possibly go through it with him, and he didn't want it at all. He never actually said a word he just moved his head and looked at me funny. So i made sure that he didn't want any food and then went back with celia.
WE went inside and told the second man to pick whatever he wanted. I was hoping he would have picked the salads or sandwiches, but he couldn't stop eyeing the marble cake and the lemon cake, so we got him a piece of both. THe most discouraging part of the whole evening was when the employee told him that he shouldn't ask people for food and that he would need to leave because that was breaking starbucks policy. Me and Celia both take it personally when they say that to humans who are no better or worse than anyone, we all have the same eternities dont' we? God loves us all the same, doesn't he? so shouldn't we love all people the same? Anyway, Celia kindly told the employee that he was with us and that we offered to buy him food; she just looked really perturbed and got him the cake anyway.
As Celia was paying, I point blank ask the man if he knows who Jesus is? He looked at me, smiled, and said, "why yes, i do. He is my friend and his mercy endures forever." how encouraging to hear him speak those words so genuinely. How i long to speak of my Jesus that genuinely in every situation. as we continued to talk to Anthony, he never ceased to astound me at how strong his faith was and how much he believed that God would provide for him.
Definitely be in prayer for him, he was shot in the foot by some gangbangers b/c he got in the way, he has shelter but could get kicked out at any time, and he was donated some clothes and toiletry items but they were all stolen one night so now he just has a grocery bag with a few things in it. You'll never know what i'm talking about until you talk to someone first hand. Our eyes need to continuously be opened to what is around us, to the godly men and women who need to be encouraged and prayed over daily.
later i asked Celia, "why exactly did you come to me to go outside with you?" and guess what she said!?! "you didn't have your ipod headphones in."
OH Boy, did that get me excited! God planned for me to not take my ipod with me tonight for a reason and he used that little moment of me deciding to not go back to my room to get it, to orchestrate something else!! GOD IS COOL!

I pray that when i return home august 3rd and then back to samford august 27ish, that God will open up opportunities for me to pursue the passion that he has given me for the inner-city.

ok, so this has to be one of the coolest things EVER!. when we go to impoverished areas, there is TONS of glass all over the ground, mainly from alcohol. whereas, when we are walking in affluent neighborhoods, the streets are clean and glass-free. the glass is always all broken up and shattered and completely covers the sidewalks. One morning when we were walking to Restoration Ministries, the sun was shining brightly and caused all the broken glass to shine, reflect the sun, and sparkle beautiful rays of light. I then remembered this verse Revelation 4:6 "Also before the throne there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal..." So basically, the poorest of poor, get to see what heaven will be like every day! They GET to walk on a "sea of glass" each and every day. How lucky are they that they don't have street cleaners. I know i'm jealous.
GOD is awesome! and he is majesty!

new job

hello all,
so i'm really sorry it's been such a long time since i've written a blog. It's been absolutely crazy busy up here the last few weeks. Mainly because last thursday was the last day that the staff was here, meaning the students are the ONLY people here, we were all assigned jobs to take over july 8th. I'm the prayer and encouragement committee leader. I was super excited to get that job, well, i would have been really excited about any job i got, but definitely about that one!

and i will have to write more later, but it's time to go to ministry site up on the north side of chicago this week at Edgewater daycamp. Monday was a challenge, but thankfully yesterday was SO Much better. Now i'm looking forward to the water park with the 5th and 6th grade girls!

in his service,
tara

Restoration Ministries and AL

oh, i don't how i could forget to tell you about Jackie. She is a 70 year old woman who has a heart the size of Texas and a computer for a brain. She is the director of Restoration Ministries and it is pretty much one of the most amazing ministries ever. Today, it operates 28 programs and with the help of 450 volunteers serves more than 7,000 individuals annually. It reaches out to all segments of the population and has become a beacon of hope for recovering drug-addicts, at-risk, underprivileged youth, families living in poverty, and senior citizens.
When we first arrived there in Harvey, IL, Jackie greeted us with a kiss on the cheek and a big hug!! SHe greets EVERYONE with a hug. Soon after we arrived the place was buzzing with people. Just for a taste of what goes on there. we were sitting talking with Jackie when Jim arrived. He is about 80 something years old and is living in poverty. He walked in and got some coffee and sat down with us. He goes there every single day for coffee, love, and christian friends. THis day, he also needed some new clothes, so Jackie wrote him a note and sent him to the Thrift store that Restoration has so he could get some things for free. She also sends him home with sandwiches and cakes and sweets that the ministry is donated everyday.
For most of Monday we spent our time touring the humble facilities and learning what all goes on there. We also went down to the boxing club they have for kids. Just so you know, they train boxers who have won junior nationals and silver and golden gloves! it was incredible what kids can do when they are given the opportunity!

The primary ministry there is for recovering drug addicts. We were lucky enough to get to meet and get to know Al.
On Tuesday, Jackie pretty much told Al that he was going to share his testimony and If Jackie tells you to do something, you can't say No to her. So Al shared his testimony with us, it was his very first time, and it was the sweetest thing. He was involved in drug dealing heavily for over 20 years. He had been shot 3 times, hit by a few cars, and is still alive to talk about it. Today, he took us around the neighborhood so we could hang up flyers for a Block Party on July 21st, and i was able to talk to him for a long time. His life has drastically changed just in the past week. He saw and talked to a couple of drug dealers while we were out and they told him that he looked so good and that he should stay clean. he was smiling from ear to ear the entire time. he was so ecstatic to hear that there had been an evident change in his life. He kept saying that if he can turn his life around, then there is hope for everyone who calls on the name of the Lord!! He was so sweet and such a softie once we got to know him. Continue to pray for him, that he will stay clean, that he won't succomb to all the druggies that surround him and will try to bring him down. he wants to badly to be a testimony for them so they will change too!.
GOD IS AWESOME!

train talk

Wow. So the last week i have really been struggling with talking to people on the El (subway) and the bus. Every time i would get on the the CTA i would feel like i should talk to people sitting near me, but satan kept telling me that i shouldn't, that they would reject me, that they would be rude to me, or that the conversation would be awkward, or whatever he could think of to keep me from saying something. last night i read colossians 4:2-6 which says:
Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so taht we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for whihc i am in chains. Pray that i may proclaim it clearly, as I SHOULD. Be wise in the way you acto toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so taht you may know how to answer everyone.

Wow, when i read that, i knew there was no way i could get on the CTA the next morning without saying something to someone. We were traveling from 35th st. down to 95th and at the 87th st. stop a man stood up, only to go back to his seat, say a few curse words and then sit back down quite angry and then he said, "man, today just isn't my day!" Celia, (a member of my ministry team) asked him why it wasn't his day. He then started to just ramble about who knows what, none of us could quite understand him. Celia didn't quite know how to respond because she had no idea what he was saying. When we arrived at 95th, we all had to get off the El because it was the last stop on that line, and Celia, Lauren, Katie, and Bryan all were in front of me. As i was walking off, he caught my eye and he was just shaking his head with a slight smile on his face. He saw me at the same time and began thanking me and the other girls for listening to him. He said that was what he needed, just someone to listen so he could cool off and help him not be so angry. At that minute, God opened my mouth and didn't give me anytime to think anything through. I told him that there is a God in Heaven who loves him and will always be there to listen to him anytime he gets upset. That God is a God of peace and of comfort. All i had time for was to hand him a tract and tell him to read it because Christ could change his life. He then introduced himself as Oscar and just thanked me. I thank God for handing in my lap an opportunity this morning. Pray that Oscar reads the tract since we had to go opposite directions and i was unable to present the gospel to him.

Then this afternoon, (we have a 40 minute bus ride after a 30 minute El ride down to 159th st., so that's part of the reason i was so convicted that i wasn't talking to anyone). So this afternoon, i ended up sitting in the very back of the bus, right in the middle of 5 seats. At about 130th st., a guy came and sat down near me, he then pulled out a dvd player and began watching a movie. There was also other people sitting to my left and i wanted to talk to one of them SO BADLY, but nothing was coming out of my mouth. I began praying. I said, "lord, open my mouth so that i may speak." and he said, "tara, its not you speaking, open your mouth and I will speak." then i started arguing a little saying the same things as before, "well, what would he say? i don't want to make him mad cuz he could be in a gang or something." then i remembered colossians that i had read last night and i counted to three, took a deep breath and leaned over to him and asked him what movie he was watching. that initial few statements are the hardest thing EVER! but it was apparent after a few minutes that he was willing to talk and wanted attention. He was desperate for some attention and someone to talk too. For a while, we talked about the movies that he illegally makes and he sells and then about his 1 year old son, which he showed me a picture and he was ADORABLE! Then he started talking about school, and he wanted to finish his business degree. He said that people keep telling him to go to school for himself but he wanted to go for his son. And right then i saw an opportunity to bring God into the conversation..tee hee :) I said, well, I'm going to school to be a pharmacist because i want to glorify my Lord and Savior. And so i can help people physically and spiritually.
As we were getting closer to 95th (our stop), i had to quickly tell David of how Christ came to free us from our sins and died on the cross for each of us and we should accept him into our hearts. I told him that Christ would always be there for him, and always love him. Unfortunately, we had to go our separate ways and i wasn't able to share more with him. So pray for David as well, and for his son.

Edward and Earl continued

after Sarah told them that God would definitely take away all bad thoughts that they had, they seemed a little more at peace but there was still something holding them back. Edward repeatedly said that he did not want to fall off track. It was so sweet how much he expressed that he by no means wanted to be hypocritical, if he changed, he wanted it to be for good. He did not want to go back to his friends a changed man and a few weeks later be the way he was before again. He just didn't think that God would want anything to do with him since he would probably go back to the way he was before.
and this whole time, I just kept praying, "Lord, speak through me, because my words will mean nothing. Give me the words to say that they need to hear." And seriously, as Edward was speaking, God helped me to remember the story of the lost sheep.
I then told Edward and Earl how we all will stray off the path, because the path is narrow and the devil will always be trying to deter us. The great news is, is that Christ will always leave the 99 other sheep, to come find us, to come find Edward and Earl wherever they have strayed too. and when Jesus finds them, He will pick them up and sling them over his shoulder and carry them back to the correct path.
Their faces lit up and their entire countenance began to change and they truly smiled for the first time.
Shortly after, I told them that I would pray the prayer of salvation and that God knew the desires of their heart and he would hear their prayer. After i prayed, I asked if they wanted to accept Christ and if the prayer i prayed was something that related to what they wanted.
And praise the Lord, they said YES!
i then asked for him to pray it out loud, and adorably he asked if he could repeat it after me.
When I opened my eyes, they could not stop smiling, nor could they contain themselves to sitting in one location, i think they were about to jump out of their seats for real.
Sarah asked where Christ now was, and they said, "in here (and pointed to hearts)."

I was ecstatic to say the least. Just to think, that the angels in heaven were rejoicing and singing praises that 2 more individuals could join them in heaven singing praises to our Father in Heaven.

I said, "wow, guys, just think, NOW, when you die and go to heaven. You'll stand at the gates of heaven and the angel will open the book of life and begin looking for your name, and He'll find it!"
at that moment, Edward jumped up and exclaimed, "and i'll RUN in through those gates!"

oh my goodness, that just makes me teary eyed every time. one of the hardest things i've ever had to do was walk away from those two men without being able to at least leave them a New Testament or something. One of the hardest things i have struggled with this summer is witnessing to random people and not being able to stick with them and help them on their journey to a deeper relationship with our Savior. My heart absolutely breaks when people see the love of God in me and others on my team and we walk away never to see them again. Almost every person I have talked too, particularly Terrence, Edward, and Earl, are so thirsty for true love, for something more than what's on this earth. Never before has it been so evident how ready the harvest is, and how few the workers are. We do not have to go overseas to have plenty of mission opportunities. The next time a homeless person asks you for change, i STRONGLY encourage you to not pass them by. INstead, STOP and ask if they would like a meal or if they would want something better than change, Jesus Christ. And you know what, the homeless people i've met, are really nice. Yes, they may spit food all in your face while they are eating, but you might too, if it's been awhile since your last cheeseburger :)
ok, well i just got on a soapbox a bit, but it's something i have come to feel strongly about since being here.
and back to the struggle i had just leaving people after we witness to them.
I have come to realize that if God can bring a random person like me into someones life, then by all means He can bring someone else into their lives to help lead them in spiritual growth. I must depend on God to do that, because i am nothing and i can't do everything. I must trust God and everything will be ok for Terrence, Edward, Earl, and others who we have witnessed too.

But please pray that all three men will go to the church that we directed them too in their community. So that they may have accountability from other believers so they may stay on track and keep their focus on Christ.

Christ is the light of the world and we should all strive to keep our focus on Him at all times.
PRay unceasingly and Praise Him even more than that for He saved us.

Edward and Earl

WOW!!! God is absolutely amazing.
Last Tuesday had to be one of the most exciting days ever.
My ministry team arrived in Cabrini Green (one of the largest housing projects in Chicago) about an hour early so we decided to walk around the neighborhood in hopes of ministering or sharing the gospel with individuals in the area.
Me and Sarah (a staff member) were walking together and saw two men sitting in a park area, so i asked how she felt about going over to them and talking to them. She was like "yeh, sure, let's go." So we crossed the street and walked right up to two men who definitely were not clean and were probably homeless. We introduced ourselves and their names were Edward and Earl.
I jumped right in to asking them if it was ok if i asked them some spiritual type questions. They agreed and the first question i asked was what they thought happened after death. Edward said, "well, i don't know, i've never really thought about it. i guess it's just all up here (and pointed to his head)." So i questioned if he thought there was a higher power or a heaven or hell, and he was like..well..yeh, i think there is, but i haven't thought about it.
I asked a few more questions and the last one was what his desire was to know God personally on a scale of 1-10. (oh, p.s. these questions are from a survey thing Campus Crusade uses at colleges, but i was just asking from memory or whatever God led me too). Amazingly, Edward said a 10! So i was like, well, i can tell you how you can do that, would you like me to explain it to you? and he said SURE!
So i sat next to him and told him how much God loved him, so much that Christ came to this earth to die so that we could spend eternity with him. That's how much God wants us to have a relationship with Him. Both men kept telling me how many bad things and bad thoughts they had, and they just couldn't understand how Jesus could take that away, how they could just stop having those thoughts all of a sudden. Sarah then told them of how it would be a slow process, but they would eventually only have a desire to love and serve our God and Saviour.

Gosh!...well, i have to go,...this is a to be continued blog :) Pray for Edward and Earl. and i'll finish this awesome story soon

Terrence

Hey everyone,
we just started our ministry sites yesterday. Unfortunately, we have not been able to work with kids yet, BUT we have moved over 100 computers from a 3rd floor down to the 1st and we painted disgusting bathrooms and doors. So the actual ministry sites has been one which we won't be able to see the people enjoy yet, but we know that we are still serving the Lord by doing tasks which would have taken hours with one person or cost alot to afford painters.

On a More SUPER exciting note, the past two mornings have been awesome.
We arrived at our site (At Circle Urban) about an hour early and decided to break up into teams to walk around the neighborhood and hopefully witness to some people. The Lord led us straight to Terrence. God gave me the opportunity to share with Terrence the gospel and offer him a father-son relationship that he didn't seem to have ever had. I believe he wants to pray the prayer of salvation but wasn't quite sure while we were there with him. He kept asking us if we could come back and talk or go to church with him or something, but we were never going back to that particular site.
As happy as I am that he heard the gospel, my heart breaks over the fact that i can't help him in his search for Christ. I had nothing to leave with him except a little salvation booklet, and it hurts so much that i had nothing else to leave him. Continue to pray for him and that God will bring someone to him that can help him grow.
Terrence (age 19) also needs prayer that he can get a job. He just got kicked out of some people's house on the north side and ran out of gas when he got to his cousin's house at 1am where we were at. He slept in his car and really has nowhere to go. Pray that he can find his home in Christ.
i have more awesomeness..but that will be later...it's time for dinner

first weekend in Chicago

Hey!
WOW! so i am incredibly excited about what God is going to do for the rest of the summer, because even after 4 days here in Chicago, God has already shown me so many things and He is obviously working. So far, all we have done is orientation type activities, getting acquainted with the city and the Subway (the El) and learning about all the different ethnicities and having a deeper love for the city and the people here.
This past weekend, our assignment was to go out and meet random people. Saturday, I went to Albany Park and had to interview people about their community and about their religion without the intention of witnessing to them, just learning about them. It was really neat to see how diverse everything was. Everything was in Spanish or Korean, rarely was anything in English. OH i even got to go into a Korean Pharmacy. Surprisingly, it wasn't that different, the pharmacist said the only difference was that she could make Korean type concoctions (who knows what that would include!).
OH, while me and a staff member were walking around, we could not find anyone who was sitting outside to interview, so Sarah said, "well, lets pray that God will bring us someone to talk to." as i began to pray, thanking God for what he had done thus far, we saw a couple sitting outside, and i was overwhelmed with the fact that God knows the desires of my heart WAY before i tell Him. Never before has it been so clear to me.

Then yesterday, me and 2 other people were in Uptown and had to take someone who looked like they were in need of food (basically a homeless person) out to lunch with us. It was very discouraging when people kept saying no, but God knew what was going to happen. Finally after an hour and a half, we had decided to go back and just eat lunch ourselves b/c we were really hungry, and THEN.... David, saw us, and thought, "what are they doing on this side of town?" lol, so we started talking to him and asked him if he would like to go to lunch with us. and he excitedly says "YES! Can WE GO TO mcDonald's!!" WOW! that excited us so much. Just seeing how God provides. I think because he wanted us to realize that we needed to just quite thinking we had it in the bag and it would be totally easy to find someone, so when we finally stopped depending on ourselves and gave Him complete freedom to reign, that's when God can work in miraculous ways.
David was a little bit on the crazy side, but he was so thankful that we would talk to him, sit with him, and buy him lunch and a strawberry shake. It was neat just to listen to him.

Today, was my first time to go out and witness to random people at the University of Illinois at Chicago. And being outside the bible belt, i'm just continually shocked at how people really don't know about the Bible or Christ. When you ask them what happens after death, they say,....hmm.." i think you just disintegrate into the ground" and my heart breaks for them. I'm so used to people at least having knowledge that God exists, but that is far from what i've come into contact with here in chicago.
Anna (from Purdue) and I were paired up to go out and evangelize. At first, i was pretty nervous since it was my first time, but it made me really depend on God to speak through me and take charge of my words. I pray that i am never comfortable, b/c that opens the possibility that i become dependent on myself, and no one will ever be reached for Christ with my words alone.
Pray for Juan. I went through the tract with him, but i almost had the feeling that he was just giving us the answers that we wanted to hear. But he could have left, he didn't have to stay there and listen. Pray that the seed we planted is able to be watered later.
Praises are that other groups had people accept Christ today! it was so Awesome to hear their stories when we all met back together. God's hand was moving this afternoon. Now UIC needs prayer for what those individuals' will do with their decision, that they won't be brought down by their friends but instead find people who can encourage them and help them grow.

Tonight we just finished our first bible study group (Action group) time. And it was about a passion for God. I was really challenged in the question of what does that look like? It's easy to describe what it looks like when we are passionate about other things like sign language or food or anything else. But passion for Christ I hope is demonstrated in me in all my actions and words. And as Katie said, "that Jesus OOZES from us." I want Christ to ooze from me. I want to grow deeper and deeper in Him.

I can't thank you all enough for all of your support as I am here this summer. God has definitely blessed me with amazing friends and family.

no reason to worry

so in exactly 18 days I will be on a plane to Chicago, IL, where I will be for EIGHT whole weeks. it's kindof crazy. I think it's somewhat equivalent to me moving to Birmingham for school, because i wasn't around my family all the time, but then again, they were ONLY an hour away if i ever needed anything. And I could still call them anytime i wanted too. I think its starting to sink in that i won't be able to just call them whenever i want too, nor can i just call any of my friends any time i want too and go hang out spur of the moment like I do while I'm at Samford. But, it wouldn't be much of a sacrifice if i was able to just hang out and chill whenever i wanted too while in Chicago. And yes, i'm starting to get nervous that I may get homesick, I may not get along with someone in the team, or there might be conflicting viewpoints, or many other possibilities arise when are with people you have never met before and BAM you are living together for 8 Weeks!

THankfully, God can cast out all fear, anxiety, doubt, and worries that I, or anyone, may ever have. Hebrews 12:2-3 says, "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

Wow! those verses are so encouraging! If Christ can endure some of the worst persecution, be beaten and have his skin ripped from his back, have 3 nails driven into his body, and hang on a jagged wooden cross SO that I, tara, can see his love for me and for all mankind and so that I may live with Him for all eternity. THen by all means, I can definitely suffer for Him. I don't know what may come this summer, but if it ultimitely brings glory and honor to God's name, then there is nowhere else I would rather be on this earth.

One verse that I have heard quite a few times in the last week is Jeremiah 29:11-14a, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,' declares the Lord." How comforting are those verses. I think God has been screaming them at me, because seriously, I've heard them or read them almost everyday. IT's just an awesome feeling to know that He already knows what will happen long before it actually does. He wants me to find Him in every situation, I must seek Him with all my heart. GOd desires a relationship with each of us, and He has glorious riches that He wants to pour out onto us! Do we want a relationship with him? Are we willing to 'suffer' for Him like he suffered for us? Will we call upon Him, pray to Him, and SEEK Him with all of our heart, mind, soul, and actions?

Therefore, God has me in His loving arms and nothing can ever take me out of my Father's hands. I have no reason to fear or worry because God has absolutely perfect plans for me and for everyone who seeks after Him.

ONE MONTH LEFT!

Wow! i absolutely can not wait to work with kids from Chicago! i got a glimpse of what it might be like while i was in St. Louis over Spring Break and every time i think about pouring Christ's compassionate love out into the lives of children, i get a huge smile on my face! God has HUGE plans for this summer, and i may or may not be working with kids, but whatever he has me do, i know that it will be part of His will. Because I am not privileged enough to thwart God's plan for me. I am a mere vessel of His perfect plan. My prayer is that I consistently seek Him and that I obey Him when He speaks. However, I never want to be so caught up in looking to the future and what I hope God will eventually do, that i miss what he sets right in front of me. Sometimes i think God gets frustrated with us, ok, I KNOW God gets frustrated with us. He puts opportunities and people right there for us to reach out and minister to, but we keep looking past it to the new and exciting upcoming summer vacations, or we look for BIG AWESOME overseas mission trips and we think that that is the only time that God can really use us. But we are Wrong! He can use us when we are sitting in the cafeteria. He can use us to be shining lights of Christ when we go into the gas station to buy a drink and the sweet woman behind the counter says "oh! its so nice to have some pleasant people come in." That's the opportunities when God wants to use us. When we can say, "Thank you, I am happy because my Lord and Saviour is AWESOME, alive, and He loves me and you more than we could possibly comprehend!"

I pray that i see the daily opportunities to minister.

There's a song by Kathryn Scott which beautifully describes how much I need, want, and desire Christ. And that even after Christ fills us with his love and mercy, it only makes us want him more and more!

When my soul has cried it's tears and my heart begins to faint

Will You draw near? Will You meet with me?

When my days are filled with longing and my spirit groans and waits
Will You draw near? Will you meet with me?
I'm calling and waiting, Your presence Lord, is life to me

Breathe on me now As I bow down

I'm desperate Lord for more of You

Come satisfy, until I am even more in need of you!

When my dreams have been forgotten, and my hope begins to fade
Will you draw near, will you meet with me?
When my days are filled with searching and my strength has given way
Will you draw near? Will you meet with me?
I'm calling and waiting, Your presence Lord, is life to me.

Passionately Desire God Daily